The day the virus came to stay

My baby’s poorly – and it stinks.

No, really, it stinks.

There’s nothing quite like being woken at 2am to change a nappy that smells like something concocted by a mad scientist with a penchant for experiments created out of dustbins and sick. Yum.

It’s been a week now. At first we thought it was the teeth. “It’s those bloody teeth again,” I told the (self-proclaimed) Northern Love Machine knowingly. Then, when a tooth failed to appear, I blamed the water in Rochdale. “It’s this water, it’s different from the Southern stuff she’s used to,” I pronounced, equally as knowingly.

Then it was something she ate. Then it was back to the teeth. Then, after a fifth day of guessing – by which time I’d been struck down too – I had to accept that, sometimes, Mother’s not always right. Sometimes it’s the doctor who knows best. So off I dutifully trudged, stinky baby in tow, to the GP.

And, of course, as soon as we got there Frog perked up. She was commando-crawling, clapping, blowing raspberries and pretty much doing everything she could to put on a good show, except for a tap-dance. She’s yet to learn that trick yet, lazy baby.

I explained that we’d both been poorly. The doctor looked disbelievingly at my almost-tap-dancing child and sent us home with some rehydration sachets and a diagnosis.

The “medicine” is all well and good, but it was the diagnosis I most appreciated. Finally, no more guessing. My options were running out and the (self-proclaimed) Northern Love Machine was starting to get more and more doubtful of my increasingly outlandish attempts to explain away those stinking nappies. “It’s because you took her swimming and let her swallow the water,” I’d yelled at him the day before. “And then you gave her a banana, everyone knows bananas are bad.”

Finally no more need to prove I am the All Knowing One, so in tune with her daughter’s body she merely has to look at her before announcing the problem.


My options were running out. Next on my list was Delhi Belly and considering Frog’s never actually been to India I’m aware this may have been clutching at straws.

So a virus it is. But between you and me, those teeth aren’t completely off the hook. Let me have some diagnosis glory at least?

Get well soon Frog.

She's ill. Honest.



Filed under Baby stuff, Family, Teething

12 responses to “The day the virus came to stay

  1. Doctors surgeries have a habit of making sick children suddenly perk up….and well parents feel ill !
    I hope you & Frog feel better soon

  2. Katrina Welland ( Alice Baillie's Cousin )

    Anything new that she ate recently ? it could be something she ate or you switched her with .

    Get well soon Frog Xx

  3. Bless her!! Lets hope it doesn’t pass round everyone… least you have it out of the way! Get well soon both of you x

  4. Helen

    bless her ! I’d recommend the BRAT ( bananas, rice, apples and toast !) diet for her for a couple of days. Livvy had this when unwell and it did help settle her poor tummy

  5. mummymummymum

    awww. Poor Frog and you. I hope you are both better soon. We’ve got a date on Friday remember. 🙂

  6. Jane Clarke

    the only thing teething does is produce teeth, not poo,vomit or any other concoction known to man. Its a virus you should have spoken to me you didnt need the GP for a diagnosis or a treatment.You could have stayed in the house and in the warm not giving or recieving every bug in the waiting area of the GP surgery.

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