As well as being a co-presenter for a breakfast radio show, I also earn my crust as a writer. Part of this job involves writing features, part of it involves writing commercial copy and part of it involves blogging.
I rarely put any of my work-related writing here because this is my personal space. But I wanted to share my most recent post for one of my clients, because it’s something that I could easily have written right here.
It’s 10 o’clock at night and I’ve had a difficult day. I’m tired and emotional and a bit overwhelmed.
We’ve been at the hospital, you see. My daughter, now approaching 22 months old, is still not walking. The doctors think there may be a problem with her hips. Continue reading
I’m dreading tomorrow. I’m anticipating tomorrow. I can’t wait for it to come. The thought of it fills me with dread.
Tomorrow I should find out what is wrong with my little girl, if anything. Tomorrow I should find out if my non-toddling toddler is just a late walker or if there is, indeed, a more sinister reason for her lack of mobility. Continue reading
I’ve always prided myself on having a “live and let live” attitude. Until someone does something which I find extremely annoying / questionable / offensive. And then “let live” goes out the window and I decide everyone should live along my code of life. Because I am always right, clearly.
When I became a mum I was shocked at how this attitude took itself to the next level. Mums who let their babies cry in the night – why? Mums who didn’t choose Baby-led Weaning – why not? Mums who were all competitive about their baby’s milestones – what’s the point? Continue reading
I’m guest posting over on The Netmums blog today, as I help them launch their campaign for United Kindmums. This post is all about a random act of kindness I’ll never forget, which helped me through a difficult day of early motherhood.
It’s a dark, chilly October morning. I’m cold and feeling very low. My baby is crying because she’s tired and has the sniffles. I’m crying because I’m tired and have the sniffles. We both want to sleep.
The newborn bubble has well and truly burst. My beautiful daughter has reached four months and, while I love her so fiercely it makes my heart physically ache, I am exhausted. I feel spent and alone. My husband is at work all day and my friends haven’t yet got children. The hours until bedtime stretch ahead like a dark, sleepless void. I cry again.
I feel like I’ve failed my daughter somehow, because I’m not feeling bubbly and happy today. I feel like I’ve failed at motherhood somehow, because I’m not enjoying it this morning. Continue reading
With wine on a Friday night.
It starts with a whisper at around midday. I can hear it humming softly from the fridge in all its cold, fresh, delicious glory.
The call gets steadily louder as the afternoon wears on. With each tantrum from my beautiful, highly-strung 20 month old daughter, the wine positively sings from the bottle stacked lovingly in its cosy white home in the corner of the kitchen. Continue reading
Many an afternoon rolls around when all I want to do is switch on CBeebies and sit back on the sofa as my 20 month old daughter trashes the house. Getting up for work at 3.45am can do that to you.
But, most afternoons, I manage to resist the call of Mr Tumble and his cronies until at least 4.30pm. Instead, I don’t even let myself sit down. We go to a swimming lesson on a Tuesday afternoon and a music (read – clapping and bashing a drum) class on a Thursday. Every other afternoon I look for activities or playdates in advance. Continue reading
It’s been dawning on me for a while now. There’s something missing in my approach to motherhood.
I will never be perfect mother material. And when I say perfect, I mean perfect.
I’m not on about the obvious stuff, like regularly forgetting to make Frog brush her teeth, or occasionally letting her smear ketchup over her vegetables.
No, I’m on about something altogether different.
It’s a quality that starts for many women during pregnancy. These women are natural mothers. They are good at motherhood before their offspring are even born. The calm descends and they sit, zen-like, in a beautiful state of blooming fertility.
And as their child grows within them, they metamorphose into a Butlins Red Coat. Continue reading
The idea of a spa day, balloon ride or personal shopping day may seem a little far-fetched for a Monday morning. But I’m about to offer you the chance to win just that, courtesy of Experience Days.
Experience Days offer deals for a huge range of activities, from indoor skydiving to rally driving, spa days to personal makeovers. It’s all there, at an affordable price.
The thing is, if you’re anything like me, you’ll dream of that perfect day without ever actually doing anything about it. When it comes to spending a wad of cash on myself the blasted Mother Guilt pops up again and I’ll put the money to one side, promising myself I’ll get my roots done next month instead. Continue reading
It’s a hot sunny day. It’s a miracle I’m dressed. Frog is around a month old.
The novelty of night feeds gazing at tiny finger nails is starting to fade into a mild yearning for sleep. Prolonged sleep. Sleep that lasts more than two hours at a time.
My friend is coming to visit today. My oldest friend.
We meet her from the train and she takes us to our village pub, where we sit in the garden overlooking the canal. We eat a ploughman’s lunch and chat about the new person in our life. Frog sleeps.
But then my baby wakes. She cries. The cries turn to screams. She is hungry. Continue reading
Every single day so far this year – minus last week – has been about getting to grips with a new way of life.
It’s been about balancing on the edge of a cliff face, determined not to fall off. It’s been about struggling to maintain a sense of calm while a million things on my “to do” list whizz through my head.
It’s been about trying to be the best mum I can possibly be, while being the best radio presenter I can possibly be, while being the best copywriter I can possibly be, while being the best blogger I can possibly be, while being the best feature writer I can possibly be. And still remain some sort of wife to my husband. Continue reading