Tooth ASBO

Well, here we are again.

After a brief respite from The Teeth, it looks like they’re back. And this time they’ve brought an army.

Not content to make our entire family miserable for at least two months, Mr and Mrs Tooth have got their friends in on the action. Four of them have already set up camp in Frog’s mouth. And now three of their mates have gate-crashed the party.

Like all good tenants, the four Teeth that are already here aren’t causing us too much bother. They clean up after themselves and haven’t caused much mess. But the same can’t be said of their friends.

No, their friends are anti-social little buggers. They cause runny nappies and dribble, moodiness and fully-fledged Teething Tantrums. It’s fair to say they’re the worst house guests you could imagine. So I’m issuing them with a Tooth ASBO.

Yes, you heard me right.

The terms are as follows:

• For the Teeth in question to refrain from causing any more pain.

• For the Teeth in question to appear out of the gums in a timely and calm manner.

• For the Teeth in question to just HURRY UP.

If the terms of this Tooth ASBO are breached, the punishment will be retirement in a little box at the bottom of the bin, rather than the plush surroundings of Tooth Fairy Castle.

Be warned.

When The Teeth are behaving themselves...